What The Brotherhood Means To Me
Posted in conversations on July 8th, 2006 by williamDon Alexander and I had a conversation at CP that made me realize that we have never really discussed what the Brotherhood means. So I think I should tell you what it means to me, and why.
When we originally began discussing the idea of a warband, we did some research and came across another specific warband’s site. The Brotherhood owes that warband a great deal because it was their site which made us realize not only did we not want to emulate them in any way, we wanted to create something that extended beyond the fighting field.
At the time we started our discussion, I had a very hard time with the idea of forming an SCA warband. You see, my National Guard Unit had just been activated and sent to Iraq. Knowing that my Troops, in many cases young men and women that I had helped make into soldiers, were going to war without me was very difficult. I had a terrible sense of guilt because they were there and I was here. They were putting their life on the line while I went to work at my meaningless job. Then I found out that Sgt Perry was killed by an IED. This devastated me because not only was Sgt Perry a great guy who had served with me for years, but because identifying and responding to IEDs was one of the classes I specialized in. There is nothing I could have done to make that outcome different, but I still felt as if I had let my boys down. I explained this to the guys and told them I was not sure I was going to be able to continue playing in the SCA, that the idea of forming a Brotherhood Warband somehow seemed wrong to me when real soldiers, men who were my comrades, were dying.
The camaraderie of soldiers is a very necessary thing. Even an individual you don’t have anything in common with, becomes your brother through shared experiences. That camaraderie allows a soldier to overcome his fear and do great things; unfortunately it can also overcome social stigmas and allow him to do horrible things. Today’s news from Iraq is full of both examples. General Macarthur said it best when he said, “A soldier doesn’t fight for his country. He fights for the son of a bitch next to him.”
It was then that I posted the first of my questions: “Why do we fight?” It was about probing that hurt within me. Trying to find why I felt the way I did and how that compared to other fighters. Because of my training, I have a very specific view on the fighting we do in the SCA and the responsibilities that any Warrior, indeed that any individual capable of violence, needs to have. In posting that question to the group, I discovered that many felt the same way I did and had come to it from a very different path.
I have trained in martial arts, with the gun, and the knife for a good portion of my life. This training started well before I entered the military at 20 and shaped me accordingly. But interestingly enough, the reason I sought this training was often very different from the students I met upon that path. As a kid I was fat and not very popular. I turned to books and gaming. The heroes I read about became my role models. Their philosophies forced an introspection that led me to Bushido and Chivalry. My mentors at that early stage were Robert Heinlein and Joel Rosenberg and the other authors that attracted a young geek’s attention. It was the examples they gave me that formed the image of who I wanted to be.
A funny thing happened to me on the way to becoming a hero. I met a lot of men I couldn’t stand. Men with flexible honor who had all the skills to be heroes but not what I thought of as the other standards to go along with them. Real life soldiers and fighters that had all the experiences that my books had convinced me I needed to have but were not who I wanted to be. These were not bad men, simply men who were not the quite the heroic figures I wanted them to be in everyday life. Harsh reality had shaped them. A reality where gunshots are not clean or quick, where you don’t hear the bullet that kills, where the coppery stench of blood makes your gorge rise, where one man doesn’t eliminate a dozen enemies and there is no soundtrack to remind you what you’re supposed to feel. Where killing another human being haunts you, no matter how righteous the shoot. In short they learned that there is no glamour in war or strife.
When I read our groups answer to my question “Why do we fight?” it struck me that the standards and goals that I held myself to were mirrored in our group. It struck me that because reality was so harsh, it was so important that we believed in the fantasy.
Terry Pratchett said, “It is only through Fantasy that humans can be that place where the fallen angel meets the rising ape.”
Camaraderie can make a human do awful things but it can also make them be the hero they need to be at that moment. Honor gives us the standard that we measure our own worth. Responsibility allows us to do what needs to be done for the good of the group Chivalry allows us to rise above the id and treat those around us with grace, compassion and Respect.
The SCA gives us a place where we can nurture these concepts. The historical examples become very important for they show us that the seeds of these ideas can grow in the harsh environment of reality. It is now that these concepts are so necessary, as our technical evolution as a race has reached a point that we can reach past the struggle for day to day survival and grasp something more. Whether we settle for bread and circuses or reach beyond that for these golden ideas depends on what is important to us.
The Brotherhood is about grasping these core ideals and being better people. The Brotherhood is about being that ground in which these ideals continue to find root. Setting the bar high and through the magic of camaraderie, being able to reach it, becoming better than the needful naked monkeys that reality would make us. Together we can change the world, through our actions we can make it better, and if this is true of us, how much more true of the generations to follow.
The SCA is a game, but like so many games it teaches lessons. What those lessons are depend on how I play it and how I keep score. If the way I keep score is by how much political clout I have or by the fact that I am feared as a fighter on the field, then I can definitely win, gaining those things, staving off mundane concerns, and having fun doing it, thus probably making it worth my while to play.
If I keep score by the honor I carry and the enjoyment of those around me, not by being feared on the field but rather by being respected and sought out because of the enjoyment I bring to the field with me. If I gain prestige because I do the things that need to be done for my Shire and for the enjoyment of others, then the SCA has taught me not merely to survive life but to truly live it. If just one out of every ten seeds I have planted grows, then I will have made the world a better place and truly been a member of the Brotherhood.
